Standing in the hot water of the shower
The music blasting in the room
I close my eyes and scream out
I scream out for being hurt
Tears stream down, mixing with water
I slide to my knees, head down, defeated
My hand slams into the shower floor
Over and over again as I cry
I try to scream but I can't
I think of grabbing that bottle
The pills that can numb me
Slowly to end my life
Or would I end up sick
Throwing up in pain and feeling stupid
I think of reaching for what I trust
The blade that has helped me heal
The bleeding that made me feel real
Could I really die alone like that?
No, I would be scared
I couldn't leave behind those who do love me
Why is it then I just want to feel?
I want to laugh at those who suffer
I want to hurt those who push me to far
I want to be angry at the world
I want to be angry with her
I want to stop crying
I want everything to just end
So closes my eyes once again
The water rushing over my face
The warmth on my back
Like arms holding me close
I try to bring myself back
To reality, to life
Years of love thrown away
I was strong enoug to wait
I am still strong enough to wait
Why can't I have the love I seek
Why can't I have her?
Please I beg, cry and pray
Please I want to scream over
Please come back to me
Take me in your arms
Kiss me tenderly
Show me you love me
Show me you really care
Don't back down out of fear
Know I am here for you
Know I love you with all I am
So kiss me passionately again
Hold me close to your heart
Hold me in your arms and don't let go.